Love Your Life 30 Day Challenge (Day 23)

15 things I am grateful for:

  1. God
  2. love
  3. life
  4. health
  5. family
  6. friends
  7. home (Shanghai and America)
  8. UofM
  9. ice-cream
  10. junk food
  11. high metabolism
  12. knowledge
  13. education
  14. kindness
  15. peace

 

5 things I will be grateful for:

  1. my own husband
  2. my own children
  3. my passion
  4. my wealth
  5. my degrees

Trigger Warning

So I visited NHS yesterday after school, and needless to say, it was amazing to re-connect with teachers and friends .. Something i wasn’t expecting happened also happened …. To sum it up, I wasn’t given a trigger warning before my most painful memory of high school was brought up by my teacher … No it wasn’t a shady thing; No, nothing was dark or immoral … If you didn’t know me in my high school freshmen year, then you don’t know about this ……. … So … I am writing about this experience ….because I know if I face it and let it out, I’ll be able to grow … That’s what God has been saying to me …… So here we go …

In the Thanksgiving of 2011, which is the fall of my high school freshmen year … I got really ill …. like super ill … Actually ‘ill’ is an understatement … I was dying … My heart rate was at 119: a number that I will never forget … There were dark spots from my fMRI scan …. Doctors at St. John said, “Well … We aren’t sure if this is cancer …. Our equipment is outdated, so you are to be given a chance to be transferred to either UofM’s hospital or the Detroit Medical Center ……” My dad, without hesitation, claimed a spot at C.S. Mott Children’s hospital …. and that was my first experience with the university I currently attend…..I first encountered the University of Michigan through being a patient and dying at its children’s hospital …. like seriously, this is still the biggest “what the fuck” moment in my life so far …

When my high school Japanese teacher told me that her initial impression of me was that of cuteness and fragility…When the high school Spanish teacher, whom I never had as a teacher, still remembers both my face and name from helping my Japanese teacher wheel me into the elevator in 9th grade …… when my Japanese teacher proudly formally introduced me to her …. When she said they’ve been talking about me throughout these years … A lot of memories, good and bad, ugly and pretty, rushed into me …….

So I’m gonna start with the ugly to get it over with the fastest …. A lot of bullies from high school …. These jerky boys who had nothing to do were bothering the hell out of me … They questioned the truthfulness of my illness and was spreading rumors that I am able to walk but is just choosing to stay on a wheelchair to get attention …. I got really indignant over those comments because back then, I cared about the wrong stuff .. I cared about other people’s shitty comments toward me … It wasn’t until knowing God had I known that nobody’s comments matters besides mine, so hallelujah for that !! Needless to say, not being able to walk was painful, too … Having to be in a wheelchair and get pushed around actually made me less human-like; I felt like a tool instead of a human-being …….

Butttt, there are bads and goods to everything, so I’m gonna move on to the good things !! The harsh comments from the bullies actually motivated me to practice walking, and in 2 weeks I was out of the wheelchair !!! Woah !!! What a miracle !!!! It was near the Christmas break of my high school freshman year, and by then, i was able to walk, although very shakily !! I was so freaking gosh darn proud of myself !!!! Another one of the good things is that a lot of people around me, including my Japanese teacher: Mrs. Rosen, the Spanish teacher that I never had as an instructor: Ms. Schaefer and every faculty and staff at Novi, aided me in not only getting around but cared for my mental issues as well ….. The most important lesson though, is God’s love. It was on the hospital bed of C.S. Mott’s had I prayed to God for the first time … At that time I wasn’t a believer, so I did it with the mentality of: I don’t know if God is real; I don’t think I believe in him, but since it seems that I’m about to die, why not give it a try ??? I prayed on my hospital bed, “Dear God, if you really exist, hear me out …. I want to live …. If that wish can be made possible, I’ll use the rest of my life to honor you…”

The end of the story is: I lived on, and I am praying on. Hallelujah Jesus is the best !!!!!!!!

God is the Greatest !!!

So after overcoming a long and weary jet lag and a long and weary viral infection I went back to church today !!!!! It feels so amazing to re-connect with my fellow believers at H2O church, in Ann Arbor and in America.

Because the Rackham buidling is closed for holidays, we had our first service at the union. WOW SO MUCH SWAGGG AND FUN TO CATCH UP WITH ALL OF MY FRANDS.

Ok, I’m gonna shift my casual YOLOSWAG tone back to my formal tone now.

My pastor, Nino Guarisco, shared a very reflective statement with all of us this morning, and whether you are a believer, no matter how old you are, it is a statement for you to reflect on.

“The type of friends that you make and the level of priority you place on your relationship with Jesus Christ will determine the type of person you will become while at the University of Michigan (and at any place).”

I read somewhere that by just looking at the 5 closest friends that one has, any person can tell his future prospects. I have a lot to say on this, but because of privacy reasons, I’m not gonna share anything on this blog. I’m just gonna leave it here that if you choose to surround yourself with positivism, your whole life is going to be positive, while if you surround yourself with negativity, most of your life is going to be negative.

In the end, a huge “Thank You” to God for bringing together my fellow believers at H2O to worship under one roof!! It’s amazing to see your light shine upon us and shall we love one another forever !!! Thank you; thank you; thank you !!!

 

A Huge-ass Thank You Note

好啦,明天就要回去读书。 伴随着16年暑假的末尾,大二秋季开学的前奏,让我好好感慨一下。

感谢我的神,我唯一的真主:耶稣基督的犒赏让我回家,回上海过了我的暑假。在这个假期里我所遇到的所有人,所经历的所有事都会给我带来启发,让我进化以及升级!!感谢神把我引领到沐恩堂去做圣日礼拜✝️沐恩堂真的是一个很棒很棒的大家庭❤️感谢我在礼拜中认识的所有教友,有你们,我很安心。我心永远顺服神✟

感谢家人的关爱让我每天都获得健康的生理以及心理。

感谢我的朋友们,在此要突出点名:

*江宁四班以及二班的各位老师和同学,谢谢你们向我证明了青春不老友谊不散;

*黄可欣,谢谢你和你的家人对我的赏识去你家做客还陪我一起吃饭,绘制手包,噶三湖,逛了三年的书展;

*周紫旋,谢谢你在回来的期间带我跟你飞,么么哒;

*陈方园:你很污你知道嘛🙂谢谢你(巧妙)的请客🙂你个傻逼上次不是说了我比你女票要重要么,那好🙂以后你接着请我吧🙂毕竟像我这么可爱善良聪明人好的发小不常见呐🙃

*顾远哲:虽然91岁高龄的我由于高度近视加散光、青光老化白内障,至今还认不出、记不住你那红红的小脸蛋,不过没关系你懂的,反正我认得出你爸🙂

*KD 舞蹈的老师和同学们:蟹蟹你们费心教已经肢体僵硬、骨质疏松、关节炎的我跳舞,本奶奶表示年轻了好多好多呀~谢谢你们矫正我的形体,还要谢谢你们给予我人生和价值上的启发。在此特别谢谢赵老师把我引向沐恩堂✝️

*宋天盈,宝宝我知道今年暑假你很忙要考各种试,所以没法出来浪!请务必相信,你这个暑假的所有付出都会在将来回赠给你!感谢你和你麻麻一直陪伴我这么多年。认识你是我的小幸运!我无条件支持你所有的决定!不要害怕未来,跟随自己内心去闯荡吧!

感谢每一个我有幸结交或者认识的你❤️

感谢上海,我的家,世界上最棒的城市,为我留下一片栖息之地!I❤SH。

感谢苏州河畔的规划二路给我了一片可以每晚吃饱了撑的以后散步的地方🙂

感谢上海书展年复一年的让我结交到很多良师益友以及好书。读书使人进步,阅读使人明智!

感谢’太热’/Tyler,即使在我对你产生些许脸盲的情况下还不跟我撕逼,顽强不拔地、含辛茹苦地跟我在一起Skype 和逗逼 👍🏻👍🏻🙂🙂

蟹蟹,谢谢,谢谢!!!!

我每天都在进步!我也会一直如此!

感恩!感谢!感激!

[Book Review] “The Ferryman” (I know I’m supposed to italicize it, but I don’t know how)

“I exist because you need me”

The Ferryman by Claire McFall is the first book, in a long while, that gave me a rush of blood to the heart. I finished reading this in the shortest period of time, and damn, every single page I had gone through made it worth it.

I read the Chinese translation because English is just too basic.

Lessons that can be learnt from this book include, but are not limited to:

  1. I create my own reality. 
  2. Love resolves all. 
  3. One has to give out love in order to attract love. 

Because of the background of my family and many more “awkward” circumstances “love” was once, deemed by me, a word so cliche and overused before I finished The Ferryman. 

i now know that “love” is neither my sweet words nor my cute face, it is my actions. Love must not be said but done. I now know how to better love myself, my family, my boyfriend (Sorry, Tyler, saying or even typing ‘ily’ is still hard, but I will say it when the timing is right   I’ve promised to show you love via my actions~

Let me re-iterate for the 1000000th time,  I thank YOU for this website, support and kindness! You rock. It’s amazing to find you, acquant you, know you, befriend you and boyfriend you.

You exist (in my world) because I need you, and I exist (in your world) because you need me.

Thanks for being my superhero  ⁄(⁄ ⁄•⁄ω⁄•⁄ ⁄)⁄

Thanks for being there.

I thank you for uplifting not only my mind but my soul.

May God bless us ~ ❤

O(∩_∩)O~~

Disclaimer: Albeit being a sophomore student at the University of Michigan, I still dislike reading English literature, especially the super thick books, so i read the Mandarin translation of this book.

 

Know God, know life; no God, no life.

“Well, I don’t consider myself a good Christian since I’m still doubtful.”

“May I ask you why you’re here then?”

“My mom is the reason. She is the only one in my household who believes in God while the rest of my family is against the idea of Christianity. All my other relatives considered Christianity a kind of cult because it is western. My dad had even threatened to divorce my mother and almost did that. Regardless, my mother still took me to church with her and had me baptized at a very young age. At the time of my baptism, I didn’t believe in God. It wasn’t until my mother had gotten sick had I ‘kinda’ felt God’s presence. She caught a rare illness and even the doctors have told my dad that her chances of living is very slim. Just as everyone is about to give up, I made the decision to inform the church my mother was attending at the moment. I was thinking: at least she would be pleased if her fellow believers have blessed her to heaven. The priest and his disciples followed my wish to come see her for the last time and prayed sincerely around her bed. Then magic happened. She got off her bed the next morning and insisted that she was fine. The medical staff did a checkup on her and proved her well-being.”

“Wow, God really did work his magic on your mom. This may be abrupt, but can I ask you why you’re still skeptical?”

“The lord did work his power on you and my mother, but … I don’t think I have experienced such drastic changes like the both of you … I still don’t consider myself fully and truly godly at this moment. I want to get more information with regards to God, and that’s why I’m attending this church after my job moved me to Shanghai. Hopefully after I become more informed I’ll get baptized again, with God in my heart and fully offer my soul and body to heaven.”
“Just know that even if you don’t solider yourself faithful to the lord, Christ is with you already, and that’s why you’re here at this Church. At least that’s what I am thinking”
————————–——————–
Thank you, my lovely friend, for buying me a copy of the bible in Chinese. It’s the most understandable version I have yet to see.”